Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

One hell of an emotional ride...

One that I hope I will not have to take for a long time. Never have I experienced so many emotions in a three-day period. I'll keep it short for my sanity's (and your) sake.

Saturday. Emotion: happiness.
One of my best pals got married. It was a small, intimate ceremony and quite beautiful. My hubby & I got to dance and drink and enjoyed the company of people we hadn't seen in quite a long time. The hubby even got a bit tipsy.

Sunday. Emotion: worry.
Moe's youngest son developed RSV and had been rushed to the hospital on Friday. I couldn't just sit and wait to hear something from Moe over the phone. I had to be there. I called her sister and made the trip to Dallas with her & Moco in record time. When we finally saw Moe, I knew we had made the right choice to drive up. Moe, her sister and I were able to do what "sisters" do - talk, laugh and cry all at the same time.

Monday. Emotion: worry. guilt. grief.
Moe's baby was eventually transferred to ICU and that's when I had to make the heartbreaking decision to leave my best friend and head home with the kid after all he did have school the next day. I didn't want to but something in my gut told I should.

On the way home, I pray and text family members asking them to remember Moe's family in their prayers. When I finally arrive home, I call my parents to let them know that Moco & I have arrived safely. Here's what I would like call the "sucker punch" to my day...my parents deliver the news that my sister had just miscarried her baby earlier in the day. I fell to my knees crying. I listened to my parents as they continued to tell me how my sister & husband were handling it. I just heard babble...because in my mind I just couldn't make sense of it all. I felt guilt for not being there for her. I felt sadness for her and her husband.

I didn't know what to feel. I was an emotional wreck. I found consulation in my hubby and son, and even my dog Woxy (who kept nuzzling me when I was crying). I knew in my heart that things happen for a reason. God will take care of those in whom trust him. And yet nothing in this world that's worth having comes easy...but for some reason, I felt like I have paid my dues for a while.